Don’t Drink The Water
When she is not busy touring the world singing pop music while hanging from an enormous cross, Madonna is at work on the problem of nuclear waste. The solution she and her husband have been urging on the British government is to neutralize it using water that has been mystically charged by chanting and meditation as it is practiced at the Kabbalah Center. According to witnesses, a frequent practice is for folks to face east and chant, "Chernobyl!! Chernobyl!!"
Somehow, they’ve gotten pseudo-scientific papers written up about this magically-charged Kabbalah fluid (no jokes about it "not holding water," please), and they have been so persistent that the Department of Trade and Industry and British Nuclear Fuels felt obliged to study their ‘research.’ The latter informed Madonna’s husband that his hypothesis "defied the laws of physics" but he is too much of a positive thinker to let that discourage him. Chernobyl!! Chernobyl!!
No wonder actors are often mocked as public figures.
Dear Philip Berg: Could we get rid of the scourge of the Bush Administration by turning towards D.C. and chanting, "The world is round!! The world is round!!?" (No doubt, you would suggest we all purchase a rhinestone-studded copy of the Zohar, become members and donate, donate, donate.)
Better still, could we get rid of this opportunistic abuse of ancient wisdom traditions by fakers who twist them up into slick enterprises separating earnest people from their money and distracting them from truly waking up to themselves? Maybe if we turn towards the Hollywood Kabbalah center and start chanting, "Poppycock!! Poppycock!!"
August 22nd, 2006 at 8:40 pm
The wisdom of Madonna (and Mr.) is something I’ve not invoked in a long time. Like ever.
“What would Guy Ritchie do?” (and I include his spouse) will probably occur to me after “What would Jerry Lee Lewis do?” and certainly behind “What would Mel Gibson do?”